We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
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