i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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