Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Randomize
