i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
I'm having to shit out rocks
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
