Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
