Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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