hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Randomize
