btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Randomize