I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize