I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
