We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
