Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize
