I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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