OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
