So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
