i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
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