nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
