Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
