People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
