yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
