you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
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