Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize