That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
