im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
