I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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