On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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