google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
That's when you crack a 10am beer
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize