I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
