Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize
