Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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