oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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