when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
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