i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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