Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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