Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
