I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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