Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
zippers are such a cool invention
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
