I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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