my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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