Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Two words: nipple clamps
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