i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
