summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
She bit a glass in half.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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