He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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