I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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