I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
