ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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