at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
