Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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