hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize