If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize