Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
